``.+i wish``.+

Monday, October 03, 2005

ok.
seems like lotsa those j2 kids in jc are so worried abt their 'A's.
juniors from sch and band are kinda complaining abt how they wun even manage to pass this or tt subject.
my sis too.she is worried she might hafta retain at j1.
tskk.
no worries people.

i remembered my CT flashing this transparency in class.
it was a comparison of how her students in another jc did for their prelims and the real 'A's results.
one joker.had a triple Fs,failed GP at prelims.but at 'A's!he had A A B and passed GP.
at that pt of time..i was thinking,
'wth.CT muz be lying to us.using this to make us believe this grades-will-jump-super-alot-if-we-believe-and-start-studying-now tactic will actually work.wad a cliche.i wun fall for it la.in any case,i dun even think i can even get pass tt AO grade'
this was wad i thot.
every tutorials and lectures attended.the teacher will be telling us tt IT AINT TO LATE TO START NOW.
this phrase.teachers were chanting to us every single day.
and u will see us students gg 'yea rite..u noe how much we have left not.'
this was like 3 mths b4 our 'A's.
i still haven started studying..

another month passed.
i saw more and more frens around me studying.
but i still did not have the studying mood.
everyone's mugging but not me.
worried i was but.still.no.mood.

outside the general office.
the staff put this countdown to the 1st day of 'A's counter thingy outside.
everyday.i saw the number getting smaller and smaller.
more and more freaked out i got.
sure some of u must be feeling like tt now.

u cant imagine how slack i was.
i did less than dunno-how-many tutorials throughout my whole 2 years in jc.
joleen(my good fren who sat beside me in class) always had to let me copy her work.and when the teacher called me for an answer..the both of us will freak out together.
esp for mrs lim's chem class.she always goes around checking if we have really done our work.
wth.everytime super scared outta our wits.
although jol had done her tutorials..she was still involved in this feeling-scared frenzy thingy.lol.
and sometimes,b4 tutorials,i will go over to the next class to borrow their tutorials(same combi and same teacher tts y) for show in case she checks.or i will juz say i got a stomachache and hide in the toilet.
haha.i was definitely the slackiest gal in class.

mid-year in j2: O(maths) F(chem) F(econs) D7(GP)
prelims: E AO F E8

can u imagine how screwed i was at this pt of time.
i did not cry.
for a day or 2..i still did not wanna do anything.
not coz i cant be bothered now.
but coz i was thinking how the nonsense am i gonna perform a miracle for myself this time
it seems so superdamn hard to get even a 'C'

mum had to go down to see my form teacher.
teacher told her tt my target for 'A's would be C D D and a pass in GP.
i stunned.
even my teacher dun think i will do well.she juz told my fren she expected at least 2 As from her *$@!
but somehow.this triggered the work-hard button in me.
i started taking out all my notes.sat in the room for almost the whole day.no tv.
only went outta room for meals and slp.
the more i studied,i wanted to study more.
coz the satisfaction u get from seeing urself complete even one chapter is so great =]

nearing 'A's.
i still had loads to complete.
i noe u guys by now will fret over the enormous stack of notes tt u cant complete.
fret not.
juz try to complete as much as u can.
this method is called 'TRYING YOUR VERY BEST'
so.dun give up juz yet.
there is still time.for trying ur best.yea?
juz keep trying and trying.
it doesnt matter if by the end of ur studying,u cant complete the syllabus.
u shld be glad u tried.and nv did give up on urself.
heehee.

ok.
for my 'nv say die' 'A's results(hahaha.wth):
i had A(maths) C(chem) C(econs) B3(GP) from a E AO F E8 for prelims.
this result may not be good in the eyes of those people who constantly get so many As and Bs.but its good enough for me.
this is the result of my trying.
and by God's grace =]
so peeps.juz keep trying and trying.
no giving up is the key to everything at this pt of time now.

all the best to u all!
believe in yourselves =]

serena penned at || 5:40 AM